Welcome to my happily ever after...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
lather, rinse, repeat
Well, people at work are telling me today that I am looking better, which is definitely a good thing. I came into work on Monday looking like I'd been embalmed, and although it perhaps helps my case that I had really been "sick", it hardly did much for my self esteem and wanting to get out amongst the living again. For some reason smoking meth gives your skin an almost translucent quality, and my skin was almost see thru from a month's worth of abuse. I could see the veins in my forehead, and it is not a cute look.
Since I have a master's degree in this crap (and I should be ashamed at myself for such), I know that it takes about 2 weeks for me to stop feeling and looking like something the cat threw up. I'm on day 3 sober, so if I just do this 11 more days, I could possibly feel like a human being again.
Today is my opportunity to do things better than yesterday.
I keep saying that to myself over and over. Monday I basically poured myself into my work clothes and dragged my carcass to work, at which point I slept at my desk all day, then went home and went to bed at 6 PM. Tuesday I put on clean clothes and dragged my carcass to work, where I slept quite a bit but answered a few emails and went to a couple of meetings, then I went home and fell asleep at 7 PM. Progress! Today it won't take much to do things better than yesterday, so that is still following my mantra....better than yesterday. Lather, rinse, repeat.
9:27 a.m. - 2009-01-07
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------