Welcome to my happily ever after...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
gay pride
First of all, mucho props to Oz for my new Wonder Woman template. I love me some Wonder Woman. I'm sure I've written before about how when I was growing up, neighbors would stop by, look out the window into the backyard and say to my mother "Should you go out there and check on Jonathan? He's lying in the grass not moving." My mother would simply reply "Don't mind him....he's just trying to catch his breath from spinning around 100 times trying to turn into Wonder Woman." It's sad but true.
I've been giving my diary a workout lately. Do I write in my diary because of how ridiculously hard I find accepting the new versions of myself that keep popping up? I seem to refer to the old Jonathan a lot, perhaps in a effort to remember who I used to be. Or is it to realize how far I've come?
Hmm.
Maybe because there's just a lot going on. My dad is out of the hospital temporarily while they prep him for his stem cell extraction. Then I think they harvest them for a couple of weeks and then put them back in. What they actually do to the stem cells, I have no idea. I asked my dad, and even he doesn't know. Once they put them back in, that's when it gets difficult because he'll have to stay in the hospital for close to two months.
Last night I had the house all to myself, so I went home and began to prepare for a rainy night at home. Ten minutes after I walked in the door, the phone rang. It was my mother. Very rarely have I seen my mother let that veneer crack that shows she may not be in control of everything that is going on. She broke down crying asking what she's done in her life to deserve all the things that are going on right now. And there is a lot. My dad's cancer. The family pet dying last week. My grandmother is hanging onto life by a thread and keeps saying she should just die so she'll be less of a burden on everyone. It's just one thing after another. I told her that she simply cannot think of bad things that happen in our lives as a punishment otherwise she is going to make herself miserable. I really didn't know what to say, so I just listened until she was done. That put a damper on the night, and I didn't even really enjoy The Simple Life when it was on. So I just turned off the TV and read on the couch until Carlos got home.
I am in a bad mood today. I'm not being too terribly nice to people on the phone so far. I just wish that I didn't spend all day long on the phone with people that want things from me! I know that sounds retarded. I need to turn this frown upside down!
Barf.
Remind me to trim my nose hair. If it gets any longer I'll be able to hang beads off it like Stevie Wonder.
It has rained here every day for a week now, and there is rain in the forecast every day through Sunday. I think I'm growing webbed feet.
The gay pride parade is this Saturday, and I'm sure you remember how much I protest going every year. Don't get me wrong, of course I'm an advocate of gay rights. I just don't see that parading down the street in a leather thong and a full face of makeup riding a float shaped like a giant dildo is the way to garner positive attention to the cause. Call me crazy. I'm sure that Carlos will want to go, even if there is a torrential downpour going on outside. I on the other hand will stay at home away from the crowds and the water. Greg and I decided that if we absolutely felt like we had to go somewhere, we might just go have a couple of beers amidst all the craziness and then split when everyone hits the bars afterwards. We shall see.
I'm taking a half day off work tomorrow and will be leaving at noon. What will I be doing, you ask? Absolutely nothing.
8:33 a.m. - 2004-06-24
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------