Welcome to my happily ever after...

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I am capable of being alone.

It's time that I start doing some self-work. I've put it off for a while now because I've been focusing on trying to keep everyone around me happy, yet I know the most difficult relationship you will ever have is with MYSELF. My whole adult life has been about trying to dig through fear and self-doubt to uncover the light within myself, and it has seemed out of my grasp for so long. So what is my problem, I ask myself. I'm fully capable.

I am capable. I am capable of sharing my message. I am capable of taking care of both myself and my needs. I am capable of being alone.

There...I said it. I am capable of being alone. Today when I realized that was one of my biggest issues, I cried. I'll admit that I cried a little out of sadness, but mainly I cried from a great feeling of revelation. I see that when I stray from my intended path of sobriety, it was always been because I felt alone and didn't know what to do with myself. I relapse, then find others that feel the exact same way that I do. After I've worn them out, then I find someone else. Lather, rinse repeat.

I am capable of being alone.

As insignificant as that sounds, this was such a building block in the foundation I'm trying to repair.

I am capable of being alone.

8:04 p.m. - 2008-02-12

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